Homeschooling While Traveling with The Rieds
Gone are the days where we work 9-5, at the same company, for 40 years.
Couples, individuals and families all around the world are reinventing what life can look like for them and reprioritize what matters most. It might be travel, time together, or more space to think. The most fulfilled lives are the ones we are creating.
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From Jessica's desk: Kathryn and I have been friends for years. We met when our oldest sons were both in kindergarten, immediately bonding over the fact that we had 3 boys under the age of 6 and husband's who traveled for work. Similar to our family, over the years Kathryn and Rob decided to homeschool their boys and have often traveled with Rob while he works his corporate job to incredible places throughout Europe and Asia. Her infectious spirit and willingness to try something new are truly inspiring!
Read more below.
1. What and when was the very first time it crossed your mind to do something different?
The idea of homeschooling always sat in the back of my mind. I say I was one of the crazy moms who cried when school started and summer ended. It meant my boys were going to be gone, all day, 5 days a week again. Every year it broke my heart, but I figured that’s what we are “supposed” to feel like. Fast forward a couple years. A dear friend of mine and her husband (The Klasnicks) made an incredible decision to redefine school and really, life in general. Watching their family transition from a traveling husband to a family traveling and schooling together, really sparked something in me. I still wasn’t sure how it was going to work, but I have learned in life, sometimes things just take care of themselves. All 3 boys were in school full time and I decided that I would go back to work at the school. That year was all I needed. We finished 4th, 3rd and kindergarten in public school and haven’t looked back! It was the final push in me that said I want to be with MY kids, teaching MY kids, supporting MY kids.
2. What made you go from just thinking about doing it to actually going for it?
Working at the school helped me define what I wanted for their education and for our family. My husband travels full time, Sunday-Thursday, every week. Our time with him was limited. We were struggling as a couple and as a family. What was a normal routine for most; school, sports, dinner together as a family, etc., didn’t fit our family. We wanted more time with my husband, we wanted more time together. A year working in the school, plus watching the Klasnicks grow, transform and live, ultimately gave me the courage to try. I can’t say that I always dreamed of homeschooling, but I am so happy I had others pave the way. The support and encouragement from our friends and family has been fantastic!
3. Was Rob on board? How about the boys?
The boys were on board for something different, regardless of what it was. The older two were having hard times at school and were miserable. For them, there was the promise of being with their dad more and traveling, so there were many things to look forward to. Rob was hesitant to say the least. I believe it was helpful that I was working in the school and saw first hand things I wanted to change. Eventually it came down to, lets try homeschooling for a year and see what happens. We are in year 3! Each year has been completely different. Each year reminding us why this was such a good decision.
4. Did you ever change your mind? Were you ever scared?
EVERY DAY!!! I am scared everyday and have questioned since the beginning whether or not we made the right choice. Our first year, my oldest son had a complete meltdown when his buddies went back to school. He thought he made the wrong decision. We cried and talked through the benefits and downfalls of both types of schooling. We worked through it. I think it’s important to talk honestly with the kids when they have feelings like this. Making a pro/con list helps. For myself, I depend on my husband, family and friends to tell me if this is working! When I have come to the “edge” and want to give up, I have a circle around me, encouraging me to go on. There are times when I threaten to send them back. There are times I wonder if they are going to make it through college. There are days where I am sure I am making them dumber. There are also days that I see EXACTLY why this was the best decision we ever made. There are moments where they bond as brothers and I know they wouldn’t have that in a different environment. It’s all about high and lows, giving yourself grace and trusting that YOU know your child. We have such a limited time with them. I want every moment I can take, whether I am scared or not!
5. Did you come across any naysayers?
Oh boy. Where do I start? I come from a family of teachers and a whole host of teacher friends. Plus, the community school we were at was very close knit and highly regarded. When I first entertained the idea, most of the teachers around me took offense to the idea and I listened to them when they told me I was insane and that I couldn’t do it. I let it dictate my decision for a long time. When we left the school, most people didn’t say much. It was just a look of, “Are you crazy?” You will always find people who are not going to support you when you go against the grain. Especially in a system they think works fine. You need to be confident that you have put your family first and are making choices based on them, no one else.
6. With three boys, how did you deal with friendships and sports?
We try to keep them as active as possible. They are in sports, music and anything else we can get them in. It’s important to note that you can’t expect your life to look like those who are in public school. It’s really important to define what you want for your kids and remind yourself of that. While we believe it’s incredibly important for the boys to have friends and be around other kids their age, the friendship I am concerned about and want to foster the most is the relationship between the three of them. One of our greatest hopes is that this time together creates a bond between the three boys that lasts a lifetime.
7. What was a challenge that came up in the process and how did you handle it?
Our first year was everything I dreamt it would be. We traveled, we had a great curriculum and we found a groove. Then our life was turned inside out. Our second year of homeschooling started out with my mom being diagnosed with an incredibly rare and rapid form of dementia. We received the devastating news right before we started the semester. I reached out to homeschool mamas from all over to get advice on whether to keep the kids at home or send them back. How in the world was I going to teach three boys while helping care for my dying mother? The encouragement I received was like nothing I have ever seen before. We made the choice to switch them to an online curriculum to help take the pressure off me. My boys, who were incredibly close to my mom, got so much extra time with her because they weren’t gone all day. The whole time I had myself convinced that an entire school year had gone down the drain because of circumstances beyond our control. After the dust had settled, I decided to test the boys instead of having a year end evaluation. Low and behold, their scores were great. It reminded me that there is opportunity for learning in everything. My boys learned life lessons they wouldn’t have received had they been in school. Isn’t that what this is all about?
8. How did you afford to do it? Any ideas you can pass along to someone that feels like money is keeping them from making a change?
There is an overwhelming abundance of homeschool curriculums that range from free to thousands of dollars. It really depends on what YOU want to do and how much effort YOU want to put in. Khan academy is amazing! We use that when we need extra help in math and language arts. Simple google searches for math worksheets, reading comprehension, reading lists, science experiments, the list goes on and on are readily available. I have found the more money you spend, potentially the less planning you have to do on your part. In year three, and I am crafting my own curriculum, piece by piece.
As far as travel goes, we are in an interesting situation. We take every opportunity we can to travel with my husband for work. It means our schedule changes quite often and we have to be flexible. We have airline miles and hotel points that my husband has accumulated over the years and that takes a HUGE financial burden off us. I would recommend to those who travel and want more points, get a credit card for one of the airlines. Totally helps!
9. What has your family experienced or how have you guys changed?
We have completely changed as a family. Not sure if it’s time, maturity, defining goals, heartbreaking loss, or a combination of it all. I say it has been the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I truly believe that all of our relationships are stronger because we have had this intense family time. Travel has opened our eyes and hearts. We have been able to visit 8 different countries and travel the United States. Those trips made us work as a team. We had to rely on each other in ways that maybe wouldn’t have presented themselves had it been just another vacation.
The biggest gift has been all that I am learning from them. They continue to teach me more about life than I ever thought was there. If you give kids the freedom to be who they are, they get to blossom into all they can become. School is a place of conformity and there are reasons for that to be necessary. If you can look beyond that, you begin to see how naturally creative, curious and smart our kids really are.
My biggest piece of advice is to define what you want your family to look like at the end of the day. Then stick to it! Even if it means you don’t look like anyone else in the neighborhood and people look at you like you have three heads! I know, it’s hard and easier said than done. But, once we took a step back and decided to write rules for our family based on what WE needed and wanted, things began to shift. It takes time and there were/are many tears, but eventually we recognized that trying to live life like everyone else was hurting us. We needed to come up with a different game plan. Rob wasn’t going to stop traveling. We wanted to be together as a family more. We wanted to show the kids the world! It seemed like a no brainer and it has been. For as many amazing days we have had, there are just as many hard days. In those moments, you do have to hold onto the decision that brought you there in the first place and the goals you have for your family. Reach out for support during those times. Sit with your kids during those times. It passes. Hopefully you have a moment the next day that reminds you why this is the best decision you have made. -Kathryn